Thursday, October 29, 2009
So last night as I was doing my normal nothing here at home. Watching house and drawing when I got an IM from my friend Gaby to come carve pumpkins. I was pretty excited I love doing the carving thing :D So I took off to go carve up some pumpkins and luckily on my way down my street that is in the middle of town I was paying attention because out of no where two deer jumped right in front of my car. I slammed on the breaks the first one dodged to the left and I felt it bump my car slightly and the other one did one of those crazy back jumps that deer do also avoiding my car. Got my adrenaline going for sure. Made my way over to Gaby's place where unfortunately, all the pumpkins had been cut up. She said she was surprised so many people had made it over lol. So I had a few drinks and just hung out and watched em play some Wii sports. I also found out that the oldest person there was 23. 23 O.o !!!!!!
Made me think man this town is not made for people my age. You meet a particularly awesome girl and she's 6 yrs younger than you. In this instance there were a few there that were still teenagers. I started dating cherry when she was 21, and Mackenzie albeit We're not dating even though I'd like to give that a try lol She's still 21 too. Maybe, I should be looking for a place where the singles scene isn't fresh outa high school. I have made a rule though I will not date anyone under 21. It's not that I don't think they can be mature enough lord knows I'm just as crazy and immature as any high school kid sometimes.
Its just that girls as well as guys need to come into their own and know who they are and with out that period of acceptance of self; then you get from them exactly what they think you want them to be and not who they are. Even now I still find it difficult not trying to be what i think a person wants me to be to woe them. You want a person to see all your best qualities even if your not like that at all. I'm sure there are guys out there who act like complete dicks because they know girls are looking for guys who aren't trying to be what they want and end up with a dick lol. Weirder still is nice guys who see girls hooking up with one prick after another make the assumption that you have to be a prick to get the girls you like. sigh. Crazy missed up world my friends.
So here I am to my knowledge and the references of my peers I am a nice person with good qualities, not a bad boy, not a dick. I'm just me I'm not always exciting, I like to be boring sometimes and others I'll be completely spontaneous and run around like a crazy person. I'm the far left and the far right. I'm overall moral and yet too often lecherous and immoral. I live on a whim of what can make me smile and what will help me truly treasure a moment. A brilliant color in the fall that causes you to stop and look at the trees, An intoxicating aroma as a girl passes and the wind whips the memory of your brief encounter back to you. Mainly, just looking for someone to hold and love. All I need no great over compensating list built around the assumption of the perfect girl. Let me have a flawed and interesting girl over a pieced together robot made from my own quirky needs. Just my thoughts today.