The Ethnic sleeping Cap

So A while ago I was walking through Wal-mart looking for some hair nets Now they had the kind that the lunch lady wears and I was like while I will be using this for food prep I don't really want the lunch lady look. Kept walking checking different areas in the hair care area and I stumble upon the "ETHNIC" section its all of 1/4 of an isle long obviously, we don't have too many Ethnic people in Manhattan or they must go elsewhere for their haircare needs. Well I found a much better caliber of hair nets. They were a lot more expensive but so far have lasted way longer. While I was there I found a sleeping cap made of satin. Thought, interesting something to keep my crazy long hair from attempting to murder me every night. So I grabbed that to. Let me just say for the record it totally works. I love it! I wake up in the morning not pulling hair from my eyelids, mouth and wrapped menacingly around my neck. I just pull of this satin cap and down it falls. Better still it falls with that signature bounce and vitality that hair has in shampoo ads. With that slight curly bounce.

So while I am not "Ethnic" I gotta say this product is totally worth it to anyone who has long hair. So in other news today was the first day of Auntie Maes Mighty fine poetry night featuring my poster. Pretty excited It turned out really well. Also did the art for my friends radio show which was spoced to happen tonight but they forgot their keys so the radio just played christian rap music for like 2 hrs. I will be a guest next week though. Man my birthday is creeping up on me here pretty soon I'll be 28 does that sound old to anyone else. O.o Oh well maybe this year will be better than the last :D

Peace all

Pepsi

Doe a Deer

So last night as I was doing my normal nothing here at home. Watching house and drawing when I got an IM from my friend Gaby to come carve pumpkins. I was pretty excited I love doing the carving thing :D So I took off to go carve up some pumpkins and luckily on my way down my street that is in the middle of town I was paying attention because out of no where two deer jumped right in front of my car. I slammed on the breaks the first one dodged to the left and I felt it bump my car slightly and the other one did one of those crazy back jumps that deer do also avoiding my car. Got my adrenaline going for sure. Made my way over to Gaby's place where unfortunately, all the pumpkins had been cut up. She said she was surprised so many people had made it over lol. So I had a few drinks and just hung out and watched em play some Wii sports. I also found out that the oldest person there was 23. 23 O.o !!!!!!

Made me think man this town is not made for people my age. You meet a particularly awesome girl and she's 6 yrs younger than you. In this instance there were a few there that were still teenagers. I started dating cherry when she was 21, and Mackenzie albeit We're not dating even though I'd like to give that a try lol She's still 21 too. Maybe, I should be looking for a place where the singles scene isn't fresh outa high school. I have made a rule though I will not date anyone under 21. It's not that I don't think they can be mature enough lord knows I'm just as crazy and immature as any high school kid sometimes.

Its just that girls as well as guys need to come into their own and know who they are and with out that period of acceptance of self; then you get from them exactly what they think you want them to be and not who they are. Even now I still find it difficult not trying to be what i think a person wants me to be to woe them. You want a person to see all your best qualities even if your not like that at all. I'm sure there are guys out there who act like complete dicks because they know girls are looking for guys who aren't trying to be what they want and end up with a dick lol. Weirder still is nice guys who see girls hooking up with one prick after another make the assumption that you have to be a prick to get the girls you like. sigh. Crazy missed up world my friends.

So here I am to my knowledge and the references of my peers I am a nice person with good qualities, not a bad boy, not a dick. I'm just me I'm not always exciting, I like to be boring sometimes and others I'll be completely spontaneous and run around like a crazy person. I'm the far left and the far right. I'm overall moral and yet too often lecherous and immoral. I live on a whim of what can make me smile and what will help me truly treasure a moment. A brilliant color in the fall that causes you to stop and look at the trees, An intoxicating aroma as a girl passes and the wind whips the memory of your brief encounter back to you. Mainly, just looking for someone to hold and love. All I need no great over compensating list built around the assumption of the perfect girl. Let me have a flawed and interesting girl over a pieced together robot made from my own quirky needs. Just my thoughts today.

Ready to embark again

I was having a lengthy talk with an old friend of mine and they said something that stuck with me. I am ready to fall in love again, ready to chance getting my heart broken again. Her name is Aimee Smith and I have a great deal of respect for this person. I thought about what she had said and thought to myself. I too am ready to take on the challenge of love again and the possibility of heartbreak. Really, that's the ultimate disablement to our think it out or jump methodology. To keep your heart in check or slide it out to be torn apart by the reavers of that realm. It seems that all my close friends are on the fence about my new crush with the assumption that I will be left broken and hurt again. Really, I have no idea the course my life will take and I am so tired of being kept up with what if's. I really just want to fall head over heels for someone that loves me the same. To fall with each other through fields of clover and lay laughing as we attempts to give clouds meaning.

I guess this has come to a greater fruition thanks to the news of an Ex moving on. Hell, all of them moving on to happiness and me left hoping for my romance unachievable. Maybe, the ideal girl that I have established in my minds eye is just a dream. An assumptions never to be realized. Man I want to be back in Japan. Soaking up an altogether new culture and living in the moment ever second. I want a new insomniac friend someone to stay up late and bullshit with. Someone to go on grand adventures with. I never want to plateau. I see it in my roommates sometimes a mediocraty that consumes. With out reason to achieve they stay and ferment. I live to experience each new moment and to garner what little I can from quick thoughts not meant to be dwelt on. For now I guess i'll just wait and hope that things will turn out alright and I'll find the one that I'm meant to be with the one that loves me with my quirky attributes that are delightful and my annoying grievances that would ward off ill suitors. Such is the hope I have. A future to look forward to.

Why we are the way we are.

So Mackenzie and I went to the Ren fest and wow was it cold. Did my best to keep her warm but yeah somethings are out of my hands lol. After seeing one of my favorite Pirate bands The Jolly Rogers. And many thanks to Mackenzie for turning me on to a band called The Decemberists how I have never heard of them blows my mind. On our way back after rushing as fast as our frozen feet could carry us to the car. We made it to Topeka in time to find our venue and then get some Red Lobster. Then off to one of the most entertaining Musicals I have ever seen and I highly recommend anyone checking this out. EVIL DEAD the Musicall. :) so much fun. Oddly enough the best friend in it was a Door Guy I knew from O Mallys. But yes ever so epic. Mackenzie and I's next adventure will be around Nov. 14th traveling back to my home town. Might be a major bonfire with some crazy explosions if my brother and I can make it happen lol.

For now this weekend I will have my art up in a private art show here in town and right after that rush off to Blood feast as one of the wild things. Should be a fun filled weekend with lots of crazy pictures. With any Luck Mackenzie will be feeling better. The week after this I'll have the pleasure of seeing the play she's in called The last Days of Judas Iscariot.

Finally I'll wax intellectual with you the few that read this lol.

Last night I had art night at my house and had Kevin, Zac, and Keagan over so yeah there were actually people working on art. But we were watching this crazy show with many different animations in it. One of them sparked a conversation about story telling and the effects it has on the youth. So I thought back and said really as children or even youthful teens we take what we want from stories and mold ourselves as such. Take a story with a powerful villain, add an unlikely hero and a damsel and what not. Basically any Disney movie. Sure the picture is painted that the villain is the bad one but what if you relate more to the villain in the story and or desire the power that they have. Even if they are defeated in the end you can still opt for that kind of power and hope to make choices that allow you to keep your ill gotten spoils. Sure we are all spoced to side with the hero but as I did many times in my youth related to the villain and the struggle they had to go through to maintain control of their dominion.

I found this particularly interesting when I had the chance to watch Mongol. Its a Russian made movie that obviously had a director in love with akira kurosawa. The movie was about Genghis Khan it showed how he rose to power and what he went through and as history tells it he was a conqueror who sparred few and ruled fiercely. Some might say a villain but the steps that lead him there are easily understandable and filled with good intentions. So it makes me wonder when we tell tales to impressionable minds what virtues are we actually imprinting on them. Traits of a hero we so long for them to become or are we showing them glimpses of the power that can so easily be obtained with the loss of scruples and the willingness to set aside your values for good intentions that ultimately fall into a deeper chaos.

Meh just some thoughts any way gotta work on some art peace.

Off to Chicago

So Mackenzie has allowed me to be super spontaneous as of late. Making plans at random and that's a breath of fresh air Coming from so many days of the same. Just waking up going to work coming home being a 4 hours social and then going to bed. So know we went to a random dinner theater. Unfortunately the food was horrible had some kind of pie which we couldn't figure out if the pie was either peaches or apples. Thats not a good thing. But the skit was really classic. A fun parody on spy movies from Bond to Austin Powers. After wards we got pie at Village Inn. We also are going to be going to see Evil Dead the Musical in Topeka and I'm definitely excited about that it's spoced to be really fun. That same day we will be driving to KC for the Ren Fest. Even more amazing then that kinda crazy randomness is that we booked a flight to Chicago and will be going to see Eddie izzard. She was over at my house late one night and we were talking about our mutual love for Eddie Izzard and I was like we should see when he's on tour. Oddly enough he was on tour just now but surely I thought this show in Chicago would be sold out. And this is the crazy fate part the tickets for that show went on sale the next morning at 10 and so there we were up at 10 in the morning buying tickets for Eddie izzard. So there you have it I am with Mackenzie on our way to Chicago pretty excited. :D Course it's in jan. That's going to be friggen amazing.

saintpepsi

These times they are a changing

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So been seeing this girl for a bit and enjoying her company for sure. Can't say if it will be going anywhere. but I have to admit i enjoy her company she's definitely into cuddling up n watching movies. Can't complain about that and she loves to read and learn and also pretty attractive not going to lie. Perks as well she's from Omaha which is where my brother lives so totally convenient road trip. So we will see I'm not going to want it to much because then it will fall to pieces cause thats just what happens.

In other news. Still working on trying to finish the multiple commissions I have. I was really hoping to be done with that big one from this summer. I will be trying to finish coloring all the ones I have already drawn so I don't have to feel like I'm putting off the coloring part. The picture you see above here is based off a character my brother designed by hand as a sculpture. Totally envious of those leet skills For sure. Work goes really well and yosakoi is gaining many new members. Alls well right now lets try and keep it that way :D

Speak and I will listen

Albert Schweitzer said, “In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.”

I have had many experiences in my life and I rarely regret any of them. The ones I do regret involve hate. I hated my old preacher for many years for the things he did to my family and only recently forgave him and allowed myself to let that hate go. It was so relieving I cried on the spot. Hates a heavy thing to carry around with you and something I won't let myself deal with from now on.

Anyway recently this within this year anyway I have had the pleasure of working with a guy named Andre He was pretty shy at work at first really didn't open up to anyone and for some reason he choose me when I asked about his tattoos sense I knew a bit about the meaning behind them. Surprised that anyone else in this town would know anything about the Wicca Religion we started talking about our different beliefs and recently thanks to a lot of things I've been reading I have come into contact with an interesting shift in my own beliefs. Not the core things mind you but a realization that the powers that be may be very wide and of many different varieties. So you can never fully discount some one's beliefs because to believe in something anything can make it true. For example we as Christians ask others to believe in what we believe without a great deal of solid support albeit we find what we can to shift reason to our side. But in other belief settings there are powers that are equally unexplainable with completely different beliefs and gods behind them.

So today Andre gave me a rock ... one of those polished stones you know. I just kinda stared at it not really knowing what to say when he explained that it was his personal Anahata stone it was used for healing and to relieve stress in the body and soul. He wanted me to have it for my kindness to him. He also told me he had made me a dream pillow... much the same as a dream catcher with native American lore. I can imagine. Being a big fan of dreams and especially lucid dreaming I was eager to learn more about the dreaming realm. And if a pillow could ward off the dreams of evil looking to find safe harbor in my mind so be it. Now I don't know if what I felt was real or a projection through my body based on my brief belief in his belief system but I felt energy in the stone he gave me. Weird but make you wonder just what can come from true belief.

Christianity has through prayers cured incurable and often terminal patients and what what I know about Wicca its done similar things. I don't know all I know is that my kindness has effected a man's life and his life in turn is affecting mine. Truly a benevolent heart and a kind gesture can grant you access to the depths of the human soul far faster than bribery or false promises. Trust, caring and faith remains a key to the human heart. may it lead me to great places and may I never regret my experiences.