I am a Christian, I believe in a good and loving god, but I find it really hard to be around other Christians more often than not because there is a lot of hate in those circles. When I went to MCC as a christian college i had hoped to be readily accepted but I was not. not by the general student pop they all separated in to high school circles of preps, jocks, super holy kids, and rebellious kids. There I was with a few friends but not really any cement friends to call my own in fact a rarely talk to any of my student peers from MCC. It wasn't until i ran into a local group of wiccans and pagans that i felt truly accepted. They accepted me as a christian with my beliefs and didn't judge me. Just loved me for who I was something I rarely see christian groups do. I think it has to do with all these rules Christians put forth . Sure there are rules for all kinds of things but some of those rules have to be followed or you are ostracized. For instance no sex before marriage but I know almost all my christian friends had sex before I did in fact they would fool around at church events. So i guess that must have been ok so long as you can keep it a secret. In fact its come down to secret keeping more than anything if you did something bad and feel guilty you can't talk to other Christians about it because you will be judged by your peers. It's this type of reactionism that drove me away from the church. Back in the day my GF was living with me and no as gods my witness we did not have sex but because she was living with me and i didn't hide that fact my church took my scholarship away. My family stood by me and i think them for that and view them as true Christians able to accept me for whom i am and love me without judging. My mother and father have been most instrumental in raising me to love others no matter who they are or what they have done.
I don't lie anymore, i don't see the point and I hate secrets, I will keep a secret but as for my life I will tell you the truth if you ask me. this has been at times both convenient because people know i don't lie and very inconvenient for other people who thought something we did together was confidential. lol Oh its gotten me into a few fixes. Altogether though its been wonderful. Now i haven't had to face the ugly head of the obsessively hateful christian right in a while and that's saying something because of the siding with the right politically and i firmly believe that churches should stay out of politics. So because i respect and love my dad i try and stop myself from ranting about the FAR right. But recently i found out about something so disastrously evil that it made my skin crawl. Three evangelists went to Uganda to speak out against being gay. WHY!?! what happened to the word of Christ's love. What happened to God salvation. Why are they spreading messages of hate and fear mongering. Due to these threes interference in Uganda a bill was proposed to execute any person who was found to be gay. Women and men there had already been overly abused for it but now they were to be executed. All because of some hateful propaganda spread by followers of "god" This is not what it means to be Christians and it is not our right to judge other and especially to dispose the assumed will of our lord on them. Some of my best and dearest friends are gay in fact one is looking to go to Africa in the peace core. Could you imagine how i would feel if he was executed for his sexual orientation because of what these three instigated. it turns my stomach to see the hate that boils away in the hearts of Christians everywhere for gays. God loves them too. The verses these groups use to support their claims to biblical hatred come from the old testament which were laws imposed by the leaders of the time to coral the misdeeds of the people and were then put null n void when Christ came. Gave use the true rule to live by. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Would you like it if gays were in the majority and forced laws not allowing heterosexuals to get married, or went about attempting to kill people just because they loved the opposite sex. Think about it from the opposite side of the table here folks. This is wrong and we as Christians are not called to HATE, but to love and accept and allow God to be the final say in these matters and if he indeed finds them unholy well then it's on him because I will continue to love my friends no matter their sexual preference, race, or religion. That's what i am called to do by my creator. Hate is just to much work and way to hard to get rid of. Remember back to that story of how my church kicked me to the curb. Well that was one of the first times i felt hate for someone else and I held onto that hatred for many years. It wasn't until i let it go that i was able to forgive and forget. PS gay marriage wont ruin the sanctity of marriage that's ridiculous, its a love act where two people are commeting to each other for life. sigh... sometimes i hurt for people victimized by others who rationalize things with God's approval.
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