Time to decide what we really want.

It's a reality that's killing me. To love someone and know them so well that you know that until you both figure out who you want to be and where your priorities lay you may never truly be together. Cherry and I have broken up. It came to be over something so simple and yet ultimately so big. We realized we were starting to resent each other for aspects of each of our characteristics. So it seemed our relationship was hurting our friendship. It's times like that that make you stop and either work on it and come back or push through and further damage the relationship. We didn't want to tear ourselves anymore. We had a similar break earlier this yr and it only put a band-aid on certain things. I love Cherry so much and I know she loves me too. So we'll have to see how things play out in the future. She really needs to focus on her classes and I don't know what I want. Right now I just feel lost. I hope and pray that this will strengthen our friendship and maybe our relationship. I would rather have a true friendship though than a bitter relationship. I haven't talked to my last girlfriend sense she moved out. That's a relationship that ended badly and I refuse to let this one end the same. Cherries become my best friend and I don't want to lose that. She means the world to me.

Dance you fool

So I'm going through another apparent style change in art. Basically i just wanted to try something new and that something new was pretty much what you see above. I'm honing my craft so expect to see better rendering in the future. In non art news 13 months in just around the corner for Cherry and I and the day after that is Ariana's B-day were having a PJ party. Oh how we college kids love our theme parties. The big Japanese Festival will be this weekend too. where yosakoi will be preforming twice i believe. Really looking forward to seeing the story teller again. All these morning shifts are really starting to get to me I desperately need to sleep in for some reason I can't get to sleep at night I have been drawing like crazy; much to the horror of my hand which seems to be sore a lot lately. On a recent drawing I got to use these pens my mom got me for Christmas and they worked perfectly Had I not been in a rush i probably would have used them better but i just used the largest and made sure I worked the tip with the light pressure for thin lines instead of getting a smaller pen. Looking forward to posting the result. Next up Bowling with friends see you all next to the 9 pin ;)

I will get to wear that funny hat again.

Wow it's been quite a while sense I last did a journal. So lets see has there any dramatic change in my life that would warrant a new journal i ask myself aside to post new art. Well currently I'm going through all my music on my computer and getting rid of any I don't really like. Yeah not too epic.

Carlos the place I work closed down on Tuesday because a transformer blew up underground and we were without power for the first part of the day. That was pretty cool cause I didn't really have to work. Me and the rest of the managers and the main boss just sat outside and hung out for like 3 hrs waiting for the power to come back on.

My friend Caitlin turned 22 got a little drunk at her party luckily my GF was there to take good care of me. i mean i rarely get drunk so its always weird to me when it happens. I got to see a pre-screening of the New wolverine move. It was ok I really wish it had been a movie based souly on Deadpool. What can you do though. Those Hollywood types are dumb.

But I'd say most importantly is the fact that I will be graduating from MCC finally. Turns out all I have to do is change my major up and I will be ready to go. I won't have to take any classes or do any christian service I'll just walk across the stage and receive my diploma and that may also include a minor I still have to see about that. But how awesome is that. All this would not have been possible had it not been one for my own laziness because this is a new degree that only this Jan became available. But most importantly my GF Cherry who has very subtly pushed me to success. It's her that had me opt to become a supervisor at Carlos O Kellys, She has pushed me to be more professional in my art and dealing with people. She has convinced me to wear underwear more often and Now she has definitely prompted my return to scholastic. I was actually going to take classes to finish until they told me I was done lol. So here's to you my dear thanks for all the good things you bring about in my life. I know I know everyone around me things I basically am the luckiest guy ever. weird huh. What ever see you all later.

I have picked up a new DSi it's basically a mod killer. To stop all the pirateing of DS games. So i kept my old DS to ply and or try out games first and then I'll use the new one for the games I plan on playing alot. It also can access the net albeit not very well. low memory kinda sucks. It have a way cool camera feature. All in all it will come in really handy in the moment sense i ussually carry my DS and not a camera. I have ordered a new camera too thought. Its a new powershot

yosakoi

For yosakoi

Thus concluded one year

Hard to believe that it's been one whole year. Cherry i think was more amazed at this than I. It wasn't an unusually romantic nights. More relaxing than anything else. We started the day off by sleeping in. I tell you this is an amazing way to start any day. Afterward we roused ourselves and went off to rent a movie after deciding not to go to the theater. Feeling a bit hungry seeing as we had slept through both breakfast and lunch we had gone to one our favorite restaurants and of course had out favorite waitress and eat heartily. Feeling very full and very happy, we went back to my place and watched one of the three movies we had rented called Lean on Me. It had Morgan Freeman in it and was just a marvelous movie that was definitely all Morgan Freeman.
After that we got to hang out with a married couple named Dallas and Cat Love. Dallas being my roommate. We thought about playing Apples to Apples. But we ended up using the red cards as things to play charades. After that we thought about watching a movie with Dallas and Cat and Cherry said we should watch the one I rented. I really hadn't expected to watch that with any one but Nathen because its a guilty pleasure for me and him sense it's obviously a bad B movie. It was funny but definitely not something we should have watched, i give cherry mad props for actually staying with it for the whole movie lol. This movie being " My name is Bruce" with Bruce Campbell afterward to get that wonderful movie out of my GF's head we watched the office till we fell asleep. Perfect day :D Much love to my dearest Cherry and our one year mark.

What about Work

Working can be hell. Can't imagine how any job no matter what it is even if it's something you really wanted to do could be hell. Sometimes I feel working at what you want to do is almost worse.   Then you are expected to do what you love on a schedule.  For now art is what I love. I do commissions on the side for a little extra cash. This comes in super handy sometimes and others you end up getting stiffed not that it costs me anything but time.  This is still for the most part on my terms. I choose the time and I always give myself enough time to finish so nothing is to difficult and that way I'm wonderfully happy with it.  So i choose to be a supervisor at a wanna be Mexican restaurant... So many people say they want so badly to get out of their job, town, or what ever but to go where.  So long as i can do art for myself and get enough time to read I'm happy.  Pleased as punch i am.  The best part about where I work is the people i work with so much fun and you can always tell when someone just works and someone won't fit in all all.  I have never felt like I have wasted my life I really enjoy what i do because i do what I like and i do it for me.  I have many friends to share these times with, a love to hold, and a family to fall to whom i know will always be there and love me.  Life is intrinsically good.  I could be doing anything and it wouldn't matter so long as I'm happy.  Really that's what is truly important.  Sometimes it goes up others down but it's ok it all seems to work out in the end.  So here's to more wonderful experiences with my friends and family.

Dream journal big bang

It was as close a family as you would ever have and yet we all seemed to travel in many different vehicles. Always spreading out across a city when we got there to that it felt more like visiting each other when we left to run into each other. We were a talented group of performers and that's how we earned our way in the world. To explain the kind or performances we did I wouldn't call us a circus act but we had our own appeal. This evening was about my eyes witnessing something so beautiful and yet so destructive. The horror of the unknown and the unexpected. The day seemed like a jumble of craziness I and my brothers were getting ready for bed at the time and the weirdest thing was we looked out into the night sky and saw these two bright streaks of light in the distance like shooting starts. Here's where my mind throws me for a loop we all yell for our mother to come check out this amazing spectacle and when she gets there the streaks in the sky were all that was left. All of us were really excited to have seen such bright shooting stars. Until we heard the concussion blast. The worst part was we knew people in that part of the city. A bright inferno rose up into the sky so high that the night seemed to turn to day I remember looking at the sky thinking wow its nearly blue skies. The second object must have been smalled for the fiery cloud didn't match the first but our vehicles were rocked and blasted with debris. Altogether having seen tornado's and other natural disasters this one really kinda stunned me. Although that sense of dread flowed through me I was ok My family was still safe and I had them because in the end family is what matters.

I still woke up and nearly fell outa bed after having that dream though lol . Wordie